i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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