I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize