butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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