i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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