my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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