Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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