Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize