I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize