Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
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well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
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My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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