Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
How does one acquire holy water?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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