And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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