If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize