Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize