hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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