But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize