I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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