everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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