Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize