Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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