Girls should come with a carfax report
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize