Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.

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  (949): She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree. http://tfl.nu/gm08
  Replies (3) Good night (1143) Bad night (393) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone

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  (609): He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone http://tfl.nu/qd6w
  Replies (31) Good night (2172) Bad night (700) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.

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  (856): Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend. http://tfl.nu/zfxw
  Replies (10) Good night (3426) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.

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  (954): tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"? (1-954): Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards. http://tfl.nu/k91c
  Replies (72) Good night (10701) Bad night (1210)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.

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  (206): Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order. http://tfl.nu/s8w4
  Replies (4) Good night (3153) Bad night (808) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.

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  (817): he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup. http://tfl.nu/cgag
  Replies (6) Good night (2538) Bad night (827) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.

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  (330): theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles. http://tfl.nu/gk69
  Replies (29) Good night (6717) Bad night (977) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.

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  (+44): She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre. http://tfl.nu/gzcq
  Replies (5) Good night (2377) Bad night (610) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight

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  (616): Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight http://tfl.nu/blku
  Replies (10) Good night (1732) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?

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  (218): Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday? http://tfl.nu/s08h
  Replies (5) Good night (1998) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job

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  (615): What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job http://tfl.nu/r059
  Replies (8) Good night (1257) Bad night (586) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on

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  (832): You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on http://tfl.nu/zwxm
  Replies (4) Good night (2960) Bad night (548)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"

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  (630): i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four" http://tfl.nu/s544
  Replies (13) Good night (657) Bad night (2315) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.

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  (508): So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test. http://tfl.nu/gxsj
  Replies (31) Good night (8085) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"

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  (301): And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok" http://tfl.nu/hwnp
  Replies (5) Good night (254) Bad night (515) Order T-Shirt

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