just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I am naked and annoyed.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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