ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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