I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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