bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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