Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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