There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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