i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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