i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
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I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
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This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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