Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
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So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
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Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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