i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize