he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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