Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
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