there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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