and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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