Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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