So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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