the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
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I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
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I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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