OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
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the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
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At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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