Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
cat food counts as protein by the way
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize