Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
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I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
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The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
third nipple confirmed
I enjoy the company of your penis
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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