Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize