Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
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I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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