i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize