I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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