How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize