How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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