I think I died a long time ago.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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