I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
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i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
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I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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