Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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